Thursday, November 25, 2010

I should be...

I can't wait for this month to be over. Every milestone of this month is a tough one... because its all the things that should be happening... I should be testing right now. I should be peeing on a stick waiting to see the pretty line and waiting to call my IM to give her some really great news... But here I sit... no stick peeing for me. Well, I could but it wouldn't be very much fun.

So, I hope that she knows I am thinking her and wishing her a very wonderful Thanksgiving. I know that things didn't turn out the way we had planned or hoped, but I still think about her. I still hope that she is able to have the sweet baby her heart longs for.

I wonder if she will ever be able to move forward without regrets. The clinic said they wouldn't work with me, because of my weight. When she finds a smaller surro, what happens if she doesn't get pregnant? Will my IM ever be ok? Will she spend time questioning herself and the clinic, about their choice? I pray that she does find the perfect person and that it works out wonderfully for her. I just don't want her to endure any more heart ache.

My heart is thinking of you. I hope you having a wonderful Thanksgiving, full of Love and Laughter, and know you will always carry a special place in my heart.

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