The fact that my journey ended before it really started has really set in. I haven't heard from my IM, and I don't really feel like its my place to call her anymore. So, I will leave her be and she knows how to find me if she wants to talk. I really wish her all the best in her journey to becoming a mother.
I am sad... but I have to find a way to pick myself up and go on the search again to find IP's to help. I just don't know where to start now. I am working on loosing some weight. Thats a tough thing for me, but something I really need to do... otherwise, I just don't know how to move past the sadness I feel about the loss of that relationship. Where do I start looking? How do I go about finding an RE that will work with based on my weight as it is now and find IP's at the same time? Its all so complicated!
Things were supposed to be so different and I am sad that they are this way. I was supposed to be planning my next trip to NY and finalizing my contract, not being sad for the loss of a journey with someone I couldn't wait to help! UGH! Its just not fair!
7 years missing you !
2 years ago